The Riza Magazine

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Inner Critic and a Squishy Tummy

I have something to admit. As happy as I look in these photos, I’m actually kind of bummed. The outfit is giving out good vibes and I’m left wondering where it went, why it ain’t giving me the popping upbeat energy on the inside? I guess you can’t always feel good even though you look good. Ha. Ha.

Okay, seriously though. Let’s talk. Let’s be real. I’m admitting that I’m bummed here on the inter web because I know what this is. We’re familiar with this feeling. You know it. I’m bummed this negative energy is around even when I’ve been winning lately. Yup, that’s right, the Inner Critic strikes again.

Yeah, she’s here hanging out when I’m trying to chill after working so hard and winning so hard.

It started when I finished a project. I couldn’t even be one hundred percent relieved I completed it and that I completed it superbly (chef’s kiss) because Inner Critic showed up with a “well, what now?”

Then I chatted with my fam. I’ve been trying to do better about showing off my wins. Not showing off. I’m not like that. But simply sharing facts of my life. I work and I do good work. I share my good work. I share my wins. My fam cheers for me. They shared my joy and my excitement. My fam says, they love getting updates and that we should do this more often. Inner Critic strikes, “What if you don’t have good news to share every week?”

Good golly, let me just talk to my pamilya!

So yeah, this is what I’m dealing with today. And I speak (or in this case, write) Inner Critic’s crazy bull shit because if I keep it inside me, afraid to admit that I’m afraid, the fear will grow. It will fester and it will result in good talented Victoria-Riza slumping on the sofa, doom scrolling, and shopping for things with money she don’t have. Victoria-Riza don’t want that (is it weird to speak in third person? I’m advocating for myself to my Inner Critic. . .you should try it). Victoria-Riza wants to create.

Victoria-Riza will create.

Victoria-Riza will illustrate.

Victoria-Riza will write. Oh wait, I already did that. Boom!

That last one was for my Inner Critic. Now to finally silence Inner Critic and its nonsense, let’s chant the words of that girl who dissed Charles Barkley in Space Jam. In place of Charles’ name, insert your name because your Inner Critic is posing as you with no talent. But you have talent so you tell this poser to be gone.

You ain't Charles Barkley. You just a wannabe that looks like him. Be gone wannabe, be gone!”

Now let’s just enjoy this outfit — the colors and form of the fit. Otherwise, we’re making fun of brands who make pants for tinny-waisted and long-legged women. Can we get the numbers on how many of those kind of women exist? Anyway, I got them on despite the waist having zero stretch. My little one may have said, “Momma, your tummy is squishy.” Zoom in on that pull of the waist band. I have no shame. She tight! She was never meant for this short Pinay with a mom bod.